Thursday, April 26, 2018
I'm Such a Charmer!
It's like bees to flowers around me. I guess it's kind of flattering, really.
Two or three months ago, I applied for one of the two open seats on the Foundation. And my application was all it took. Two days before the Commission meeting to approve (or not) my application, four people suddenly applied for the two seats. On Easter Sunday! Well, of course it only made sense to seat people who had shown no prior interest in the Foundation, or any other area of Village functioning. I totally understand that.
This month, I applied to be on the Public Safety Board. Two people had applied back last year, but since there can't be a Board, and there's no quorum, with only two people, their applications were never approved. There wouldn't have been any point in approving them. But with my application, the Board could function. Damn, if after I applied, seven other Village residents weren't suddenly overtaken by an inspiration to apply for that very same Board. It's kind of like magic.
I think I must have some sort of voodoo power in the Village. I can fill any Board, just by applying to be on it. And I stimulate way more applicants than are needed to fill seats.
I don't know what to say. You're welcome?
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It is an amazing coincidence.
ReplyDeleteI'm really curious who applied, but the agenda is not out yet, it should have been out yesterday. This is at least two months in a row that the agenda is late.
Chuck,
ReplyDeleteI'm not mad at you. I'm disappointed, and I'm insulted, but I'm not angry. You should know me well enough by now to know that I am a dramatically self-focused and self-centered person, and I do not like to consider that anything isn't all about me. I thought I had made clear that I believe this whole pattern is a reflection of my personal magnetism, and the effects I can have on people I don't even know. If I apply for a Board, "the force" is affected, and everyone seems to become energized and motivated, in ways they never were before.
Now, having said that, I do admit that there are two other possible explanations for what is happening, although it is my impulse to reject them both, because they are not celebrations of me, me, me. One of those alternatives is the grossly impersonal one you suggested, which, disturbingly, would appear to have nothing to do with me. (Perish the thought.) That is, that what we're seeing is just a coincidence. And being the magnanimous and perspicacious person I am, I considered that...possibility. But I don't think so, Chuck. Two months in a row? Two entirely different Boards? People who have nothing to do with each other or with me? What are the chances there could be a "coincidence" like that? No, I very much doubt it.
The other possibility is that all these people were drafted, or induced, or prevailed upon, to apply to Boards. The purpose, I might like to tell myself, since I can't bear an explanation that isn't about me, is that someone wanted specifically and concertedly to keep me off any board, and this hypothetical person applied him- or herself to finding applicants, so that board openings could be filled without resorting to filling them with me. But how could such a thing occur? What would be the mechanism? Someone would have to know I applied, so he or she could put out desperate and emergency calls, to get completely uninterested and disengaged Village residents to apply. But how could anyone know? They could last time, when it was about the Foundation, because I applied far in advance, and approval, or not, of my application was on the Commission Agenda. But what about this time? The Agenda wasn't even out yet when seven people clamored to be on Public Safety. The only people who knew I applied were Village staff, including Krishan Manners and Mailan Nguyen. And again, because I'm so smart, it occurred to me to ask Krishan if anyone asked him to report if I applied to be on a board, or if he told anyone. No, he did not. That's what he told me.
So, I'm sorry, Chuck, but I have to stick with what I believe. This is all about me and the intense aura I exude, and which influences everyone in the Village, in such wonderful ways. They become carried away with inspiration and dedication. If you still think I'm wrong, and that it's just a "coincidence," you can explain this to me.
Fred
PS, Chuck: First, regarding your observation (were you complaining?) that the Agenda has now come out late two months in a row. I'm not sure where you think you're going with this, but I really hope you don't think, and are not implying, that someone is holding up the Agenda, and manipulating when it is released. I really hope that's not the case.
ReplyDeleteSecond, I'm a bit ashamed of myself about something, and I have a confession to make to you. I actually had no interest in the Public Safety Board. I'm being really open and candid with you here, and I'm admitting that I applied to be on it as a test, to see if my powers were really as great as I thought they might be. I wanted to see if my applying would stimulate the sudden interest it did the month before, in a board that was not previously of interest. Clearly, it did. My curiosity was satisfied, and I asked Krishan to remove my application to the Public Safety Board. Now, thanks to me, that Board will be full to overflowing, and we'll see what our newly devoted neighbors think will help public safety. And I don't have to go to meetings of a Board several of us told the Commission was a bad idea, and no one wanted to be on anyway. Until I unleashed my magical powers.
Fred
Fred,
ReplyDeleteI am so sorry, I'm embarrassed in fact. How could I have never noticed this aura, this power that you have. You've shown me a different aspect of you I didn't realize, this aura is mighty impressive and it is affecting people you don't even know somehow. I suppose that we all may under your spell. So far it seems to be just affecting those in the Village. I imagine that perhaps some people may have applied from outside the Village and were turned away. Have you tested the range of this power yet?
I have to issue you some words of caution, there are people out that that might want to capture you for this power you possess and use it for evil not good. So be wary my friend and thank you for accepting my apology in advance.
On a side note the agenda has been posted, I see that you have now applied for the P & P board, no doubt due to this power you have revealed to the world there will be another group of applications by Tuesday for the P & P board.
LOL !!!!!!! May the force be with us all.
ReplyDeleteFred: I hope you get on any Board that you really want to be on.
ReplyDeleteThere was a way to construct the Boards and Committees Ordinance, which was rejected by earlier Commissions, wherein each commissioner would get one appointee to to each board. This would have provided for representation that reflected the electorate for each Commissioner rather than the slant of the majority of any given commission. This is how I have seen it work well in other cities that I am familiar with. I wish previous Commissioners had considered this as a more fair and representative method for filling board vacancies. Presuming that you would have the support of at least one Commissioner as to your appointment, this would have provided you with an opportunity to contribute.
Dan,
DeleteFortunately for you, you did not get your wish. I wanted to be on Parks and Parkways, but Randy was reappointed instead. This, of course, was the right thing.
I was first appointed to a board in 2006, when Kelly Mallette got on the Commission, and she needed an appointment. She put me on P&Z. I think it changed to the current system a few years later, when we got some bad Commissioners who wouldn't appoint people, and then appointed inappropriate people. So the Commission restructured the appointment process, to make sure there would be board members.
So the system you like was in force here, then did not work well, was replaced, and has not been readopted.
Fred
I agree with Dan, the problem with the current system is that you may have a situation where the minority is not represented and that is in fact happening now. As you put it Fred, the minority is currently elbowed in the face and shoved to the ground. As it turned out Fred received 2 votes, but Fred did not intend to take Randy's place he thought the board had two vacancies if I understood him correctly.
ReplyDelete